The Ugly Mannequin (who are you calling ugly?)

For those of you who don't know me I can be a bit quirky. For those that do know me I can hear you saying "Duh!" Sometimes, and I'm sure I am the only one, I say or do foolish things. I call this condition: Accidental Inappropriateness or AI for short.

This is NOT an ugly mannequin

I believe the first manifested episode struck me as a teenager, while walking with a friend through the old Harts department store in Delaware, Ohio. My eye was caught by two mannequins that were similarly dressed and posed closely together. The first was posed naturally. Not human naturally, but mannequin naturally. The second was posed human naturally, just standing there motionless the way mannequins do.


The first one looked like a normal everyday store mannequin. If it was in a warehouse full of mannequins you would not be able to pick it out from any of the others. I know the thought of being in a warehouse full of mannequins is a bit freaky for some so I apologize for the imagery. The second one was different than the first in that it was ugly. I had never seen an ugly mannequin before. I always thought they were supposed to be beauty neutral, well, as much as I thought about things like that.

I commented to my friend as I pointed, "That is an ugly mannequin."  I did not whisper it to him since it wasn't a secret. Other people had to have realized that it was an ugly mannequin, too. Because I was being funny, I even put heavy emphasis on the "Ug", drawing it out a couple extra seconds... "Uuuuggggggly". And then we laughed.

I don't know why I had an opinion on the aesthetics of a life-sized, plastic clothing model. I saw it. It was ugly. I said so. Unfortunately, the "mannequin" turned out to be a lady who just happened to not be moving when I had looked at her. I realized this after she looked at me and said "excuse me?".

I  couldn't play it off. When I pointed and made my exclamation it was obvious about whom I was speaking. What could I say? "Oh, wow! Sorry, lady. I thought you were a mannequin. For a lady you are okay". I would never call another person ugly or intentionally hurt their feelings. That's just not me. And now I will never knock a mannequin either.

What's my point? Although the great mannequin debacle of 1985 was truly a mistake on my part, a case of AI, how many times have I made the same types of judgement knowing that it was a real, living, breathing human being? How many times have I put down someone else's point of view, intelligence, circumstances, appearance or some other lack of normalcy? Maybe I never intentionally pointed at someone and called them ugly or stupid but I know I have thought it.  I know I have made snide comments or jokes. And we all know that's okay as long as I was just kidding, right? Wrong. That was sarcasm.

Look, we live in a society that is broken. Countless people are physically, mentally, relationally, financially and/or spiritually challenged. Some are adversely affected by the poor choices that they or some other person made.

We who believe we have it all together tend to judge from high up on our perch, those who don't. We tend to believe that what we initially see on the surface is all there is to a person. Well, these are people not lifeless, soulless mannequins. And when we indulge in crude and harsh thought or commentary about them, or bully them, we are simply projecting the insecurity of our own inner man. When we judge, we are reflecting the condition of our own heart and quite possibly crushing another human being in the process, whether we mean to or not.

I would like to encourage you with this post to consider the people around you. Those in your sphere of influence that are maybe not what you would consider "normal." Then, imagine that person as your child. Will you go out of your way to love them? You know, the way Jesus went out of His way to love you. I hope so.

If you enjoyed this post, please subscribe, share with others, and drop me a line. If you are interested in booking me for your event as a motivational speaker or comedian, check out my site at www.funnybutclean.com or e-mail me at dwaynecastle40@yahoo.com. I can also be reached directly by phone at 419-961-1265. 

PIE, anyone?

I wear lots of hats and they are mostly interchangeable. Sometimes I take the stage and make people laugh (comedian). I encourage people to move forward in unity of purpose, or to live beyond what their circumstances may tell them is possible (motivational or inspirational speaker). I share biblical truths (minister) and share my take on life (husband, dad, papaw, friend and even blogger.) That's it. What I do, in a nutshell.


No matter the hat I wear, I just do my thing. I am who I am. I give people opportunities to laugh, to think, and/or be encouraged on to better living, beyond mediocrity, into excellence.

I've never been asked to title one of my speaking engagements. Until now. I am prepping for a motivational presentation and the client asked for the name and description of my talk. My first thought was, "Hey, great idea. That's something I should have considered previously." My second thought was "I'm hungry" which isn't unusual, because it seems I am always hungry.

After snacking, I found the strength to think more about my client's request. I realized just how big her query was. The wrong title could be disastrous to my business model. It has to cover what I do, in a catchy and clever way. It has to sum up for the audience what to expect from the presentation. My opening paragraph of this post tells what I do, but how do you encapsulate all of it in 5 words or less? Geesh lady, what are you doing to me here? Woosah.

Okay, first things first. What do I do? I grab some chips, that's what I do. No, self. What is my purpose when presenting to a group? I encourage people to be their best, to do their best. I let people know that our past doesn't define who we are and although our experiences contribute to that definition, how we choose to deal with our experiences is what truly defines us.

How we view our lives and circumstances is key. If we have been victimized by tragedy, we have an opportunity to be victims or conquerors. If we are in the midst of harsh circumstances, we can be quitters or go-getters. If we are excelling in certain areas, we can become arrogant or humble. Some come from a rough background seemingly unable to catch a break while some seem to have had all of the breaks. Some grew up with great nurture while others seem to have come into the world all alone and continue on that way.

I share with people that we make choices every day that will either point us toward higher living, toward status quo or to disaster. These choices are typically made based on our perceptions of ourselves and the world around us. Bruce Lee (yes, that Bruce Lee) said "As you believe, so shall you become" but even before he said it, Henry Ford said "Whether you believe you can, or you can't, you are right". But prior to either of them, a documented thought from thousands of years before was penned: "For as he thinks in his heart, so is he..." from Proverbs 23:7a. This sums it all up perfectly.

Do you believe that "this" is it, the best your life will ever be? Or do you choose to believe there is something greater? A hope for a future, a better life. A life beyond mediocrity, beyond drudgery. Even if you have a great life, don't you wonder if there is more? I sure hope so. Your perspective is everything. Great! I have a title for my presentation: P.erspective I.s E.verything. PIE.

What perspectives do you have that may be holding you back? In what way do you believe you may need a change? By the way, I believe there is One who has the ultimate perspective, and would be happy to share with you. If you don't know Him, ask. I'm hungry. A nice slice of Rhubarb Pie with a tall glass of milk would be great right about now. How about you?

Please subscribe to my blog, comment on it and share it with those you feel may be interested. And consider booking me for your next event. If you don't have an event scheduled, I'll help you plan one. I can be found on-line at www.funnybutclean.com or reached by e-mail at dwaynecastle40@yahoo.com and by phone at 419-961-1265.